{"id":783164,"date":"2011-07-28T21:11:03","date_gmt":"2011-07-29T01:11:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/homeschoolblogger.com\/neveradullmoment\/?p=783164"},"modified":"2011-07-28T21:11:03","modified_gmt":"2011-07-29T01:11:03","slug":"fabulous-family-friday-its-time-to-let-go","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/agracefullplace.com\/?p=783164","title":{"rendered":"Fabulous Family Friday–It’s Time to Let Go"},"content":{"rendered":"

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Dallas’ step-mom stepped into Glory early Wednesday morning.<\/p>\n

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Times like this make you re-evaluate your life.<\/p>\n

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What is really important in life?\u00a0 What IS the “important stuff”?<\/p>\n

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Well, if you know me at all, you know I “preach” about relationships all the time.<\/p>\n

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Relationships.\u00a0 Those are the “important stuff” of life.\u00a0\u00a0 God wanted fellowship, so He created man.\u00a0 He didn’t “need” us.\u00a0 But He wanted a creature that would choose to fellowship with Him. So He gave man a choice.<\/p>\n

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Man didn’t make the best choice and has suffered for it ever since.<\/p>\n

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Then the Father made a way to reconcile us to Him.\u00a0 He paid a precious price to redeem us from our foolish choice of self!<\/p>\n

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What a wonderful Savior He is!<\/p>\n

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And yet….<\/p>\n

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I can’t help but think of the parable Jesus told in Matthew 18:21-35.\u00a0\u00a0 I used to tell my girls, when they were younger, how the servant owed money that if it were stacked up, would be as high as “the tower”.\u00a0 “The tower” is connected to a Cargill facility and stores grain to be used for mixing feed.\u00a0 It is 8 stories high and visible for miles around!\u00a0\u00a0 In our rural area, it stands out!\u00a0 It was pretty new when they were small, and they used to look for the tower on our way home from anywhere and start this litany of “I see the tower!\u00a0 I see the tower!”<\/p>\n

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So it made a BIG impression on them to think of $20 bills stacked 8 stories high!<\/p>\n

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(Note:\u00a0 I’m not stating that is the exact amount\u00a0or how it might look but was using it for an analogy! \ud83d\ude09 )<\/p>\n

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That’s how much the servant was forgiven!<\/p>\n

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Then what does he do?\u00a0 He goes out and finds a fellow servant who owes him $20 and says, “Pay up or else!”\u00a0\u00a0 As his fellow servant begs for patience, he has no<\/em> mercy whatsoever.<\/p>\n

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I’m sure we’ve all read that and thought, “How could he do that?\u00a0 How could he just\u00a0be forgiven a debt that he could\u00a0never repay, and then demand his fellow servant pay a\u00a0ridiculously small\u00a0amount?!”<\/p>\n

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Because he didn’t understand mercy.\u00a0\u00a0 Or grace.\u00a0\u00a0 He didn’t focus on the “important stuff”.<\/p>\n

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I have watched Christians hang onto bitter grudges and hurts, and\u00a0say things like “They’ll get theirs!”<\/p>\n

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Really–do we want others to “get theirs”?<\/p>\n

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What about “ours”?<\/p>\n

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Oh, that’s different!\u00a0 WE get grace and mercy!\u00a0 But “they” don’t “deserve” it.<\/p>\n

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It looks pathetic in print, doesn’t it?<\/p>\n

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Yet that is what we really are saying when we choose <\/em>to not forgive.<\/p>\n

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And that is usually at the bottom of broken relationships.\u00a0 Someone is not meeting our needs, someone is not doing what they should, someone else is being selfish and it hurts you….yet God’s grace is there to help you forgive them.<\/p>\n

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It’s not a feeling.\u00a0 It’s a choice.\u00a0 But too many of us are bound by our feelings.\u00a0\u00a0 And as we’re waiting for “feelings” to help us forgive, we’re getting more bitter every day.<\/p>\n

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Bitterness is not just wishing for revenge.\u00a0 It can also be hanging onto the hurts.\u00a0 Which is all too easy to do, especially when the other person either doesn’t have a clue they even hurt us, or they don’t care.<\/p>\n

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But we are commanded to forgive, to let go, to love, to bless and do good to our enemies\u00a0(Mt. 5:44).<\/p>\n

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If we are to do that with our “enemies”, shouldn’t we do that all the more with our brothers and sisters in Christ?\u00a0 Especially in our families?<\/em><\/p>\n

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This brings peace, rest, grace…<\/em>unity.<\/p>\n

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And unity is the gift we can give to Him.<\/p>\n

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“That they\u00a0all may be one; as Thou, Father, art in Me, and I in Thee, that they also may be one in us:\u00a0 that the world may believe that Thou hast sent me.” <\/strong>Jn. 17:21<\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

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How will the world believe the Father loved them enough to send His Son, when His children can’t even love and forgive each other?<\/p>\n

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When we keep His lovingkindness, His mercy, before our eyes, it is easier to see how to walk in His Truth.<\/p>\n

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“For Thy lovingkindness is before mine eyes:\u00a0 and I have walked in Thy Truth.”\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 Ps. 26:3<\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

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His lovingkindness is also His beauty, His favor.<\/p>\n

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When we keep before us all He did for us, and that we have favor with Him only because of His Son, it makes it easier to trust Him and believe that truly He can work even the wrath of man to praise Him. (Ps. 76:10)<\/p>\n

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Do we really think we can make a difference in an offender’s life by holding him or her hostage to our bitter emotions?<\/p>\n

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Christ died to free us from the shackles of guilt, shame, bondage to sin.\u00a0 So why do we insist on putting shackles on our brothers and sisters?<\/p>\n

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I told my husband the other day that I think I know what the “unpardonable sin” is.<\/p>\n

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He asked what?<\/p>\n

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I said, “Unforgiveness.”<\/p>\n

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No, I can’t prove that theologically.\u00a0\u00a0 What I mean is, first of all, if we don’t forgive, He plainly said He won’t forgive us, either.\u00a0 (Mt. 18:35)<\/p>\n

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If we are truly His, and we choose not to forgive, we may still “get to Heaven”, but we will live in a self-made hell-on-earth, because we can’t stay in fellowship with the Father Who forgave His prodigal when we harbor bitterness and unforgiveness towards another.\u00a0 We won’t feel His forgiveness, His favor.\u00a0 We will also destroy other relationships, because anyone who acts like or reminds us of the one we won’t forgive will evoke a reaction from us.\u00a0 Or we’re so consumed with rehashing in our minds and to anyone who will listen how that person wronged us.\u00a0 How we’re justified in feeling this way.\u00a0 And then we will wonder why certain people have become distant to us.<\/p>\n

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Our hearts will shrivel up more and more as we get more self-focused, self-possessed.<\/p>\n

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“Be careful that you are following Me, and I will care for all else.\u00a0 Striving is for those who have not yet learned to trust Me.\u00a0 Anxiety is the affliction of the self-possessed. <\/strong> The godly know their heritage and revel in the protection of their Redeemer.\u00a0 For it is in the blood of Jesus <\/strong>that refuge is found for every onslaught of the enemy.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 \u00a0~Come Away My Beloved, by Frances Roberts <\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

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Truly, hanging onto offenses shows a lack of trust in God, and a lack of belief that He is Sovereign.\u00a0\u00a0 He could have stopped the offense, but didn’t.\u00a0 Can He really be God?\u00a0 (Where does that lie come from?!)<\/p>\n

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By embracing the grace He extends to you, and choosing, in spite of your feelings, to forgive, and instead of rehashing what was said or what you will say when you get a chance the next time, you choose to think of His grace and say, “I choose to forgive them.\u00a0 By Your grace, I choose to love them”, then eventually it doesn’t hurt anymore.\u00a0\u00a0 And you actually DO love them!<\/p>\n

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Jesus didn’t die on a Cross so you could “have the right” to “speak your mind”.\u00a0 Or to hold onto a grudge and refuse to give grace and mercy when you have received so much more from Him.<\/p>\n

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It’s really a slap in the face to the Glorious Son of God Who died to set you free!<\/p>\n

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We really have no other\u00a0choice if we truly want peace and to stay in fellowship with Him.<\/p>\n

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It’s time to let go.<\/p>\n

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As you can imagine, life has prompted this post.<\/p>\n

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29 years ago, my step-mother-in-law had heard some things about me that weren’t true, but she trusted the one who told her.\u00a0\u00a0 She didn’t know me very well yet.\u00a0 For close to 2 years, I could tell she didn’t like me and didn’t really accept me as her daughter-in-law.\u00a0\u00a0 At the time, I didn’t know why.<\/p>\n

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I had to choose to forgive, to say, “I love her” even when I didn’t feel it one little bit.<\/p>\n

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I’m so glad I did!<\/p>\n

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As I knelt by her bedside a few days ago, holding her hand, not knowing if she even was aware we were there, I thought, “Thank You, Lord!\u00a0 Thank You that we cleared all that up years ago!”<\/p>\n

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My mother-in-law did say she was sorry, but by the time she did, it really didn’t matter anymore.<\/p>\n

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You see, if you wait for them to “say their sorry and mean it’, they will never be able to mean it enough for you.\u00a0 You will still be expecting so much from them, and when they sincerely ask forgiveness or apologize, you won’t be able to release them.<\/p>\n

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And your “balance” will be upset.\u00a0 As long as they were not acknowledging their wrong, you were “justified” in your feelings.\u00a0 But now they have received freedom from God, if not from you, and their end of the balance has flung to the Heavens.\u00a0 And you are left with the weight of the bitterness you harbored in your heart.<\/p>\n

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There is only one thing to do.<\/p>\n

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Let go.\u00a0\u00a0 Give it to Him, a thousand times a day if you must.\u00a0 But let go, before it totally destroys you and those you love.<\/p>\n

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After all, when you get to Heaven, and see those nail-scarred hands, just what will be so important to hold on to, when you look into the face of One Who let go of it all…..for you?<\/p>\n

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Remember, it was from His Cross that He spoke the ten words that are our example….<\/p>\n

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“Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” <\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

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May you find in Him <\/em>the grace, the mercy, the strength….<\/p>\n

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…..to let go.<\/p>\n

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For then you will see and know His Truth, and “the Truth shall set you<\/em> free.”<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

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May you be free in Him!<\/p>\n

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 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

      Dallas’ step-mom stepped into Glory early Wednesday morning.   Times like this make you re-evaluate your life.   What is really important in life?\u00a0 What IS the “important stuff”?   Well, if you know me at all, you know I “preach” about relationships all the time.   Relationships.\u00a0 Those are the “important […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[13],"tags":[131,152,197,217,251,268],"class_list":["post-783164","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-fabulous-family-friday","tag-forgiveness","tag-grace","tag-letting-go","tag-mercy","tag-priorities","tag-relationships"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/agracefullplace.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/783164","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/agracefullplace.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/agracefullplace.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/agracefullplace.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/agracefullplace.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=783164"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/agracefullplace.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/783164\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/agracefullplace.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=783164"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/agracefullplace.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=783164"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/agracefullplace.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=783164"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}