I had said a few weeks ago that “next week” I would write about praying for our children….I’m a little behind!!!
I actually am going to talk a lot about prayer this week.
I have been a Christian for 31 years now. Back in February, I asked the Lord to teach me to really pray. Oh, I’ve prayed these 31 years, of course! But I felt something was….missing.
I had no doubt He would answer that prayer and teach me. However–I had no idea how much He’d pour out on me in such a short time! 
You may remember that I had a miscarriage November 30 of 2008. (I WILL Trust You Lord (Even When I Don’t Understand), In the Bubble of Grace) I had a real struggle over the ensuing months, especially as the Lord has not blessed us again since then. In fact, for 15 months I wrestled with Him over it. I have had a hard time with my fertility since day 1. Miscarriages, troubles conceiving, threatened miscarriages, secondary infertility….and more miscarriages. Thirteen to be exact. (Plus our precious stillborn, Noah Ross.) I struggled to be having this “problem” at the end of my childbearing years as I did at the beginning….couldn’t I have a happy “ending”?
In mid-February I finally gave it all to Him. I still hope and pray He would bless us yet again, but I am also content to rest in His will, even if it means no more babies.
I sensed He wanted me to fast. I was praying about how when a friend sent me a link about the Daniel Fast. I got the book and immediately felt this was it! My friend was going to be fasting for 40 days, so I prayed and asked the Lord to show me how long He wanted me to fast–and make it very clear from His Word!
I was “behind” in my regular Bible reading plan for that Saturday (I jokingly say “behind”–I have learned you are never behind–God always meets you there, so you are always on time! 
). I started in Mark 1. I came to verse 13: “And He was there in the wilderness forty days….”
I laughed right out loud! I said, “Well, Lord, that was VERY clear!!!” 
And so began a journey that has had all the markings of the best stories–romance, humor, adventure, sorrow, comfort and miracles–all right here in my home, within my own heart!
Even if you don’t want to necessarily do a Daniel Fast, may I gently suggest you read the book? I loved Susan’s devotionals, and she has such a grace-based view on fasting, that I actually was looking forward to it!
I thought I had a plan that the Lord wanted me to do during this time of fasting and prayer (I had three specific things I was praying for daily), but as many have said, we need to hold our plans loosely. And that is where the “adventure” part came in!
I started keeping a journal of prayers and what I believed the Lord was saying to me during this time. I would highly suggest you do that, as well! We are such a forgetful people!
The “romance” part came in through a dear, dear friend’s daughter sharing Mike Bickle’s mp3s on The Song of Solomon. Jessica started listening to them and would share tidbits now and then. The Lord led for me to start listening to them, so I would download one or two to my phone and listen as I ran errands (I don’t have an mp3 player yet, so my phone works for now!).
I have to say that I believe this is the most beautiful series on Song of Solomon I have ever heard! Although Song of Solomon is obviously a book about the beauty of married love, it is also a picture of the Bride’s relationship to her Bridegroom–Jesus Christ.
As I listened to this series, I was reminded of my “first love” relationship to my Beloved Jesus. My heart has been stirred and I don’t want to go back to the barren wilderness of bitterness, wrestling with Him. I want to be comforted in His arms, receive strength, direction and love from Him!
I can’t remember exactly when, but sometime during the Daniel Fast I “refound” a book I had bought 28 years ago–in Strasbourg, France, of all places! It is a book about our role and purpose through prayer. I remembered it being a good book, and kept thinking I would reread it. I finally pulled it off my shelf and started reading. I was absorbed at once! Mind you, the last time I read this book was in April of 1992!!!! And this time I finished it in April of this year!
The book is Destined for the Throne, by Paul Billheimer. I’ve decided to buy my older girls each a copy, and we are going to read it together and discuss it!
“Prayer is where the action is…Praise is the detergent which purifies faith and purges doubt from the heart. The secret of answered prayer is faith without doubt (Mark 11:23). and the secret of faith without doubt is praise, triumphant praise, continuous praise, praise that is a way of life.”
~Paul Billheimer, Destined for the Throne, p. 18
Mr. Billheimer marries prayer with praise so beautifully in this book! I’ll have more to say about praise in another post (yes, yet this week, Lord willin’ an’ the creek don’t rise! ), but suffice it to say this book should be required reading for every Christian–in fact, I think we need to reread it at least once a year (instead of only 4 times in 28 years!!!)!
After reading this book, I was struck at the awesome responsibility and privilege I have as a Christian to pray. I am not a theologian or Bible scholar. I am a woman of God who loves my Lord with all my heart, and what I share comes out of that relationship. I can’t say I will never make a mistake, but my heart’s desire is to encourage other women, especially younger women, to love Him and seek Him and realize their heritage in Him. I try to base my life on His Word. I know how easy it is to err by following “feelings”! HOWEVER— I also believe the enemy of our souls would like nothing better than to dissuade us from truly praying and listening for His voice because “we might deceive ourselves”.
If there is one thing my Beloved Savior has shown me in these past 5 months, it is that as long as my heart’s desire is to please Him and know Him and seek Him, He will guide me, and if I get off track, He will be right there to guide me back onto His path for me!
He loves me too much to just let me go off on a bunny trail when I really want to be on His path!
“Perhaps some are wondering what is the relationship of the supreme rank of the redeemed to the subject of prayer and intercession. The explanation is that prayer is not primarily God’s way of getting things done. it is God’s way of giving the Church ‘on -the-job-‘ training in overcoming the forces hostile to God. This world is a laboratory in which those destined for the throne are learning, by actual practice in the prayer closet, how to overcome Satan and his hierarchy. God designed the program of prayer as an ‘apprenticeship’ for eternal sovereignty with Christ. Here we are learning ‘the trick of the tools’–how to use the weapons of prayer and faith in overcoming and enforcing Christ’s victory so dearly bought….
The prayer closet is the arena which produces the overcomer.”
~ Paul Billheimer, Destined for the Throne p. 40
I hope you will continue to join me as I share my “Adventures in Prayer” this week!
(And for more encouragment, head on over to my daughters’ blog post about Answers to Prayer!)
